Snapshots and thoughts following my anniversary

October 27, 2014 § Leave a comment

Every now and then, life hands us a real life fairytale.

I stopped believing in love – then unexpectedly fell in love.

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During this time – rather than becoming cynical and lamenting something which I have no control over, or entering a pattern of learned helplessness (e.g. awaiting the rescue of  a “prince”), I chose self empowerment.  These are my top five invaluable lessons which helped shift the paradigm & maintain motivation :

1. Perception

Perception is a major factor in determining the quality and focus of our lives. We can either succumb to or overcome the obstacles before us.

The past is a place of reference, not a place of residence. There’s no need to unpack and live there; nor will any comfort derived by unearthing past difficulties – such as perceived failures etc. Neal A. Maxwell. said  “No one was foreordained to fail. Let us remember that we were measured before and were found equal to our tasks”.  I wholeheartedly believe this & challenge perception (beliefs) frequently. Self awareness is a blessing.

2. It’s never too late

Donald L. Hallstrom said ‘Once any of us conclude, “that’s just the way that I am,” we give up our ability to change. Who we ARE is not who we can BECOME’. 

3. As A Man Thinketh

We’ve all heard of ‘As A Man Thinketh’. For those who’re unfamiliar, the book makes a connection between the impact of our thoughts, actions and subsequent destiny. To quote “A man is literally what he thinks, his character being the complete sum of all his thoughts.”

Upon exploring my internal dialogue there was a realisation & epiphany that much of it consisted of messages, labels, judgements (deficits from others) rather than being centric to personal accomplishments, strengths, capacities, ambition (indicators of self belief). Surpassing a long-subscribed-to mentality initially seemed unachievable, till I remembered that this was merely a story I was telling myself. I now feel the freedom to recreate & realign. In short, our thought process & attitude need to be congruent so that our wishes, dreams, hopes are able to be brought into reality.

This invaluable process taught that me happiness is not in our circumstances. It is innate & ready to be developed. Additionally, we are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with, therefore being in the company of those who are positive, celebrate rather than tolerate your gifts, talents etc helps create a more optimal circumstance.  All this is nothing without gratitude.

4. GrAttitude is everything (no, that’s not a typo)

“We can’t direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails. For maximum happiness, peace, and contentment, may we choose a positive attitude.” Thomas S. Monson.

Actively seeking to appreciate life in all it’s stages and circumstances promotes a feeling of abundance and contentment. It’s as simple as that. Should that be forgotten – each time I am tempted to complain, I realise that someone else is happy with less than I have.

5. Invest in yourself

“When we empower women, we empower communities, nations and the entire human family.”- Ban Ki-Moon (Secretary General of United Nations. 

Self empowerment is not just a pithy concept or ‘optional bonus’.  You possess the capacity to empower, nurture and build those around you, to change lives.  How better to begin than by first investing in yourself : invest in your education (academic, emotional and spiritual), contribute to society (your community, your spouse and family). Engage your creativity. Nurture mind and body. Invest in your intuition [instinct] – as it is a vital component in making confident life choices.  Lastly, don’t apologise for you are. You’ll always be too much of something for someone. Be yourself anyway.

By employing these mindsets, I felt sufficiently empowered to bring each dream into fruition.

There were many great adventures and new experiences.

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